Free invisible hit counter ProfShade: 10 Things to Do in Rural Ohio

Thursday, December 02, 2004

10 Things to Do in Rural Ohio

  1. Sexual intercourse, after a dinner of mac and cheese. Side order of fries.
  2. Go to the $2.00 movie, sit through it twice, heavy petting in back row.
  3. Drive from town to town looking for the cheapest gas, then sex in the back seat.
  4. Play 'hide the buckeye.'
  5. Chant 'OSU' buck naked in a soybean field.
  6. Compare church-to-tavern ratios in the 'cheapest gas' town.
  7. Try to find a Green Party member. Have sex on her porch.
  8. Blast a 'Guided by Voices' CD in Perkins parking lot after lots of pie.
  9. Try, just try to imagine Chrissie Hynde living here.
  10. Go native, go Amish.