Free invisible hit counter ProfShade: All Base Are Ours

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

All Base Are Ours

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Do not underestimate our power. We can put away the guns, tanks and stealth bombers. Free HBO, Marlboros, KFC and Budweiser will pacify the world. American soma is highly underrated and much sought-after. What terrorist wants to take the slightest chance of no Paradise in the hereafter, when he can get the Playboy channel and a bucket of Extra Crispy for free, right now? My message to the brave martyrs is simple and is thus:

Retire your fatwa in exchange for Desparate Housewives. Stay in, with your hands down and wrapped around a long-necked cold one. Alicia Keys sounds so sweet, so like the virgins you are promised, but may not receive; you have come to doubt the existence of this Paradise, haven't you? Heaven is here, now, on DVD. Surrender. Light up that extra mild. Sit back. Take a long, slaking draught of Bud. There's more and more and more where that one came from...