Politically Correct Valentine's Day Gift Suggestions
- Heart-shaped pita filled with organic humus
- Donation to PETA, in your lover's pet's name
- Romantic card on acid-free, 75% recycled card stock. You know, the stiff, flecked-with-dog-feces looking paper that smells like old gym socks
- Breakfast in bed: carrot juice, stone-ground, whole wheat toast, a yummy strawberry-tofu spread
- A solemn promise to buy tickets to 'Les Miserables' the next time it comes to town
Peach-scented candles, licorice-flavored body oil, DVD of 'Deep Throat' Hemp T-shirt, unscented goat milk soap and aromatic dream pillow.
- Tender words, whispered lovingly: "I didn't get you anything 'cause its a commercialized, schmaltzy Hallmark gimmick. But I love you. In a non-possesive kind of way."